So you’ve accepted a position with another employer. You resigned from your current job and went through the bright light treatment of the resignation process… but now they offer a counter-offer to stay. What do you do?! Is this a good decision, or even in your best interest? Let’s put on our “critical-thinking skills” cap and explore the possible outcomes.
Although sometimes employees who accept counter-offers come out ahead in the long run, more often than not they don’t. There have been numerous studies that show when an employee accepts a counter-offer to stay, they end up eventually leaving shortly thereafter…and your boss is most likely aware of this, too.
So the bloom is now off the rose. You accept the counter-offer. Your boss knows you are no longer truly happy or feel like part of the team. Your co-workers may even treat you differently. As a result, from your side of the equation, the luster of the counter wears off quickly.
Before accepting (or even considering accepting) a counter-offer, remind yourself of why you even decided to change jobs in the first place. If you haven’t already done so, make a list. You’ll be surprised to see that most of the time the counter-offer does not really rectify any of the reasons you decided to leave. Many people have compared leaving an employer to a divorce, or even the loss of a loved one. So who would want to go through that if they did not have to?
If most people are honest with themselves, they accept the counter because it makes them feel good to be wanted and it helps them avoid all the stress and discomfort of leaving and starting over somewhere else.
Even if what they are offering does solve your issue(s) ask yourself this question: why did it take having to resign to get what I want… and probably deserve? What’s going to happen the next time I request something? Am I going to have to again threaten to resign? Is this the game I really want to play? Is this the type of employer I want to be working for?
Remember what we discussed in the prior blog about resignation – if you really have a good boss, one who genuinely values you and is interested in what is best for you – they will respect your decision and know you have done your due diligence before leaving.
Although it may feel good and although you may come out ahead in the short term, remind yourself of the dangers of counter-offers and please give them careful diligence and consideration before accepting one. And if you do, I pray you are the exception to the rule and it works out well for you!
We’d love to hear about your experiences with counter offers… good, bad or indifferent. Please share your thoughts in the comments section below. We can all learn from each other.
